Well, we finally finished the book, Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne. Procrastination much?
Moving past the guilt associated with that, this book was good for an end of the year/beginning of the year read, as it forced both of us to assess our current lifestyle and pair it down to match our goals. To simplify, not only our physical stuff in the form of decluttering but to also take a hard look at the rhythms and schedule we have for our whole family (not just us).
Simplicity Parenting is really a goals and dream book. Remember when you first got married and together you dreamed about how life would be when….? Do you even remember what those dreams are? Does your life currently reflect those dreams? Are you heading in the direction of those dreams? The author, Kim John Payne, encourages couples to pull out those dreams again, dust them off, and align the details of your daily life to match those goals. So often, we get caught up in the swift current of doing more and a busy schedule that we forget what it was we wanted for ourselves. And it’s not that you forgot your dreams, you just put them on the back burner for that time when… and when seems increasingly farther and farther away. But as we talked about in Episode 35, you need to distill your dreams down into daily actions, and as we discuss on the podcast today, we talk about actionably doing this with your schedule, routines, and rhythms.
This book reminded me that the exact same things that are beneficial for us as adults (such as routines, cutting out distraction so you can have deep work, cutting down on decision fatigue) are also vitally important for children. When you are able to simplify and add rhythms for the whole family, the results you achieve are usually “far more reaching and powerful” than what you thought might occur. Kim John Payne points out that by putting in a little bit of work in these areas, you’ll gain time for connection, increase security and ease in relationships, and for partners, increase your intimacy. And who doesn’t want more of that? Intimacy can’t happen in the hustle and bustle of crazy home life, it happens in those downtime moments, and when you simplify, you can have more and more of those moments.
If you’re feeling like life with kids is crazy, that you’re just spinning your wheels, doing the day to day thing without really connecting with your spouse or your children, then this is a really important episode for you. Because after all, the author points out, “it’s not just what you make of your time, it’s whether you have the time to make it your own.”
Our challenge for you, dear listeners, this week is to write out an ideal week, individually at first, and then share it with your partner. As we discuss in the podcast, make sure to build some routines or consistency, and also some times for connection. It is in those small moments of connection that life is lived.
Our next book will be Atomic Habits by James Clear if you want to read alongside us.
Download our new freebie, How to Create a Family HQ! This is a step-by-step guide that will walk you through setting up a Family HQ so that you can get your family all on the same page.
- Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids: Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross: 8601420220201: Amazon.com: Books
- 20+ Questions For a New Year | The Art of Simple
- Meditation and Mindfulness Made Simple - Headspace
- Cortex - Relay FM
- Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results by James Clear